On Ash Wednesday, I posted a story about Lent. I spoke of using this Lenten season as a time for me to experience a personal renewal and my desire for a closer, deeper relationship with Jesus. What I didn’t realize was the journey I would face to achieve that goal.

The number 40 is often used in the bible to signify a time of testing and trial. My past 40 days has been a trek through the wilderness. It began with some alarming medical test results. Only a few days later I had a heart breaking “falling out” with a loved one. While still saddened over that incident, I received a midnight call from our youngest son who was seriously ill. A few hours later I was on a plane heading back to Washington state where he went from the Emergency Department to being admitted to the ICU. This scared me so much because I understood the seriousness of his situation. But I didn’t show my fear. I held it deep inside. I stayed until he was stable and back to his home.

Once I returned to Arizona, I tried to deal with all my emotions and fears. I prayed so hard. “Please dear Lord, give me strength and understanding. And keep my family safe.” The following week I received another phone call which led me back once again to Washington. This time for my Mom. She was in the hospital again and the prognosis wasn’t good. By now, my emotions were so raw and my mind was on overload. When I prayed, I felt desperate. I never asked. “Why me?”. But I did wonder how much more I could take. 

One day while sitting with Mom in her hospital room, I noticed how frail and weak she was. I recognized that same frail weakness in myself emotionally. And while Mom couldn’t gain back strength on her own, I realized I couldn’t either. I had to rely on Jesus. I didn’t know how many more challenges I might face on this wilderness journey but I knew if I did I had to count on Him.

This Lenten season has given me the closer relationship with the Lord I hoped for. My 40 days has taught me to trust Him completely. I trust Him to give me the strength I need when I need it. And with Easter only a few days away, my heart is full of love and praise. I look forward to celebrating His death and resurrection. His sacrifice, His love and His mercy provides all the strength I need. 

I wish you all a blessed Easter Sunday.

“God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.”  Psalm 46:1 (NIV)

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.” Psalm 3:5 (NIV)

The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped.” Psalm 28:7 (NIV)

For years people have asked me to pray for them and their intentions. I feel honored and humbled with these requests. If you have a concern weighing heavy on your heart, please connect with me on my Prayer Request page (found in the Main Menu). I would be honored to add you to my prayers. I promise your words will be kept confidential.

If my story resonates with you I would love to hear your comments below.